Jenny-Lee

My story is about Clare, the best mom in the world, who died from pancreatic cancer three years ago

The Discovery

She was suffering from stomachache for a long time, she also lost weight and was really weak. Her doctor said that everything is OK and she’s just panicked…. one night she just couldn’t stand the pain. We took her to the hospital and the rest is history.

The Impact of Time

Who would ever say that pancreatic cancer was a gift? But I do, ever since I found out that my mother had pancreatic cancer.
Together, we learned about the value of each and every moment of time.
That is a gift that I will treasure until my own last day.

My mother and I weren’t always very close. For most of my life, I was “Dad’s daughter” more than my mother’s. There were times that she and I didn’t talk. I am embarrassed to share this, but I once told my friend that I wouldn’t even care if my mother would disappear from my life.
Four years ago, in the months leading up to her diagnosis, my mother felt unwell. I thought that it was only an excuse to stay home, not to visit my siblings and me, or just to be selfish. I never believed that she was really sick.

Then she started to experience several bad months. She had severe stomach pains, exhaustion and was in terrible pain. Late one night, when she just couldn’t stand it anymore, my brother and I took her to the hospital.
I recall that first night in the hospital so vividly. For the first time in my life I began to understand the effect of time. We waited all night long for her to have the CT exam and then another two weeks to get the results of the biopsy test. It felt like an eternity.
It may sound crazy to someone who hasn’t been through such an experience, but from the moment the oncologist gave us the terrible news, I got the mother I always dreamed of, and my mother got the daughter she always wanted.
Everything changed from that moment.

We suddenly understood the impact of time. We realized that we must use the time we are given. With every passing day, time that is lost will not return. Our bond flourished from being a really tough mother-daughter relationship, to one that was full of love, caring and compassion.
11 months of time since that night when our life changed until the day we said goodbye.
47 weeks of time to spend together, crying, laughing, talking and taking care of each other.
330 days for time to deepen a super-special mother/daughter relationship that changed my life, my perspective, and changed my everything …

Today, three years after she passed away, it’s so important for me to scream to the world that it’s about time!! It’s about spending more time with our loved ones!! It’s about time to appreciate what we have!! It’s about time to share our feelings!! It’s about time to be better people!! It’s about time to help others!! It’s about time to care of ourselves!!

And maybe, most importantly … it’s about time to understand that while I won’t get my mom back, I know more than ever, that I had the best mom in the world!!

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